Sel Monologue from Three Hats A Farcical Comedy in Three Acts

From Three Hats A Farcical Comedy in Three Acts by Arthur Shirley

male · comedic · 57 sec

No! I hastily snatched the hat from the pavement and ran like an antelope, but imagine my horror when I discovered I had taken my antagonist's hat instead of my own! (FRED: That didn't matter if it was as good, or better!) It did matter very much, for since I have had two stolen I have always stuck my card on the inside and consequently I expect to be shortly called upon, and called out by the gentleman I insulted. It is not that I fear for my own sake, but if it gets to my wife's ears I shall never hear the last of it. (FRED: What are you going to do?) Simply be beforehand with my antagonist and disarm his resentment by profuse apologies--his name is Tompkins I have found that out.

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