No. People don't. However, I've decided to read newspapers in future--it'll be part of my scheme. That's why I was reading The Echo. Now, I should like to ask you something about this paper of yours. (TRANTO: Yes.) Why do you let Hilda write those articles for you about food economy stunts in the household? (TRANTO: Well--) Now, I look at things practically. When Hilda'd spent all her dress allowance and got into debt besides, about a year and a half ago, she suddenly remembered she wasn't doing much to help the war, and so she went into the Food Ministry as a typist at thirty-five shillings a week. Next she learnt typing. Then she became an authority on everything. And now she's concocting these food articles for you. Believe me, the girl knows nothing whatever about cookery. She couldn't fry a sausage for nuts. Once the mater insisted on her doing the housekeeping--in the holidays, too! Stay me with flagons! HILDEGARDE ((without looking round.)). Stay you with chocolates, you mean, Johnnie, dear.

John Culver Monologue from The Title: A Comedy in Three Acts

Rehearse John Culver's monologue