Monologue

Waspe Monologue from Bartholomew Fair

From Bartholomew Fair by Ben Jonson

male · comedic · 1:56 min

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Pardon me, sir, neither they nor you can apprehend me yet. You are an ass.--I have a young master, he is now upon his making and marring; the whole care of his well-doing is now mine. His foolish schoolmasters have done nothing but run up and down the county with him to beg puddings and cake-bread of his tenants, and almost spoil'd him; he has learn'd nothing but to sing catches, and repeat _Rattle bladder, rattle!_ and _O Madge!_ I dare not let him walk alone, for fear of learning of vile tunes, which he will sing at supper, and in the sermon-times! If he meet but a carman in the street, and I find him not talk to keep him off on him, he will whistle him and all his tunes over at night in his sleep! He has a head full of bees! I am fain now, for this little time I am absent, to leave him in charge with a gentlewoman: 'tis true she is a justice of peace his wife, and a gentlewoman of the hood, and his natural sister; but what may happen under a woman's government, there's the doubt. Gentlemen, you do not know him; he is another manner of piece than you think for: but nineteen years old, and yet he is taller than either of you by the head, God bless him!

About this piece

Waspe expresses his frustration and concern over the upbringing of his young master, highlighting the absurdity of his education and the potential chaos under a woman's supervision.

20s · confusion · identity · family · education · authority

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