Monologue

Thief Monologue from Sham

From Sham by Frank G. Tompkins

male · sarcastic · 1:11 min

Rehearse this freeFind more monologues
I do it to accommodate you. Must I be even plainer? Imagine that I go away, refusing to take anything in spite of your protests. Imagine it's to-morrow. The police and the reporters have caught wind of the story. Something has been taken from every house in Sargent Road—except one. The nature of the articles shows that the thief is a man of rare discrimination. To be quite frank—a connoisseur. And a connoisseur of such judgment that to have him pass your Rubens by is to cast doubt upon its authenticity. I do not exaggerate. Let me tell you that from the Hempsteds— —but that would take too long. The public immediately asks, Why did the thief take nothing from 2819 Sargent Road? The answer is too obvious: There is nothing worth taking at 2819 Sargent Road.

About this piece

30s · disgust · identity · power · betrayal · social status

Rehearse Thief's monologue

Run it out loud with a spotlight that follows your voice, line by line, until it's off the page. Free to start, no credit card.

Rehearse freeStart rehearsing

More from Sham

  • Thiefsarcastic · 58 sec
  • Thiefsarcastic · 2:31 min
  • Clarasarcastic · 1:33 min
  • Thiefsarcastic · 1:09 min
  • Thiefmelancholic · 1:07 min
  • Thiefsarcastic · 2:58 min

Browse