Acres Monologue from The Rivals

From The Rivals by Richard Brinsley Sheridan

male · comedic · 1:10 min

Ah! you joke--ha! ha! mischief--ha! ha! but you know I am not my own property, my dear Lydia has forestalled me. She could never abide me in the country, because I used to dress so badly--but odds frogs and tambours! I shan't take matters so here, now ancient madam has no voice in it: I'll make my old clothes know who's master. I shall straightway cashier the hunting-frock, and render my leather breeches incapable. My hair has been in training some time. (ABSOLUTE: Indeed!) Ay--and tho'ff the side curls are a little restive, my hind-part takes it very kindly. (ABSOLUTE: Ah, you'll polish, I doubt not.) Absolutely I propose so--then if I can find out this Ensign Beverley, odds triggers and flints! I'll make him know the difference o't.

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