Monologue

Helena Monologue from Uncle Vanya

From Uncle Vanya by Anton Chekhov

female · melancholic · 2:19 min

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(Alone) There is no greater sorrow than to know another's secret when you cannot help them. (In deep thought) He is obviously not in love with her, but why shouldn't he marry her? She is not pretty, but she is so clever and pure and good, she would make a splendid wife for a country doctor of his years. (A pause) I can understand how the poor child feels. She lives here in this desperate loneliness with no one around her except these colourless shadows that go mooning about talking nonsense and knowing nothing except that they eat, drink, and sleep. Among them appears from time to time this Dr. Astroff, so different, so handsome, so interesting, so charming. It is like seeing the moon rise on a dark night. Oh, to surrender oneself to his embrace! To lose oneself in his arms! I am a little in love with him myself! Yes, I am lonely without him, and when I think of him I smile. That Uncle Vanya says I have the blood of a Nixey in my veins: "Give rein to your nature for once in your life!" Perhaps it is right that I should. Oh, to be free as a bird, to fly away from all your sleepy faces and your talk and forget that you have existed at all! But I am a coward, I am afraid; my conscience torments me. He comes here every day now. I can guess why, and feel guilty already; I should like to fall on my knees at Sonia's feet and beg her forgiveness, and weep. ASTROFF comes in carrying a portfolio.

About this piece

Helena expresses her inner turmoil regarding her feelings for Dr. Astroff while grappling with her conscience and the loneliness surrounding her.

20s · longing · love · isolation · freedom · guilt

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