Monologue

Falder Monologue from Justice

From Justice by John Galsworthy

male · anguished · 2:17 min

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When she left me--because I had to go to the office--I was out of my senses for fear that he'd do it again, and thinking what I could do. I couldn't work--all the morning I was like that--simply couldn't fix my mind on anything. I couldn't think at all. I seemed to have to keep moving. When Davis--the other clerk--gave me the cheque--he said: "It'll do you good, Will, to have a run with this. You seem half off your chump this morning." Then when I had it in my hand--I don't know how it came, but it just flashed across me that if I put the 'ty' and the nought there would be the money to get her away. It just came and went--I never thought of it again. Then Davis went out to his luncheon, and I don't really remember what I did till I'd pushed the cheque through to the cashier under the rail. I remember his saying "Gold or notes?" Then I suppose I knew what I'd done. Anyway, when I got outside I wanted to chuck myself under a bus; I wanted to throw the money away; but it seemed I was in for it, so I thought at any rate I'd save her. Of course the tickets I took for the passage and the little I gave her's been wasted, and all, except what I was obliged to spend myself, I've restored. I keep thinking over and over however it was I came to do it, and how I can't have it all again to do differently! FALDER is silent, twisting his hands before him.

About this piece

Falder reflects on a moment of desperation and regret after making a life-altering decision driven by fear and a desire to save someone he cares about.

30s · despair · redemption · isolation · betrayal · freedom

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