Why, then you must know, how old Mr. Lovit is a going for to marry the West-Indian young gentleman to young Mistress Airy, I think he call'd her; and so you can go try Mistress Harriet yourself, for I'm sure she won't have him now. (WORTHNOUGHT: Why, pray?) Why if she gets him, she'll get a bastard, for old Mr. Lovit isn't his father. (WORTHNOUGHT: No?) No;--and then he and the Schoolmaster kick'd up a proper rumpus about a challenge I fetch'd him; and that's all the news you'll get for your money.--A poor shilling that won't buy ale to my oysters to-night. (Exit. WORTHNOUGHT [manet). This is a lucky meeting, 'foregad;--I'll go immediately and report, that young Loveyet has of late seen my quondam charmer carry a copy of him in miniature about her, which (strange to tell) is continually growing nearer to the life; and that he refuses to have her, on that account.--"If she gets him, she will get a bastard."--By which I choose to understand,--matters have gone so far, that she cannot save herself from that disgrace, even if she marries him.--Now, in order that this tale of mine may transpire briskly, I must first see some of my tattling female friends;--they will set it a going like wild-fire.--Split me, but it is an excellent thought;--ha, ha, ha. Poor Loveyet. [ (Exit.)

Humphry Monologue from The Politician Out-Witted

Rehearse Humphry's monologue