Ferdinand Swift Monologue from Freezing a Mother-in-Law; or, Suspended Animation: A farce in one act

From Freezing a Mother-in-Law; or, Suspended Animation: A farce in one act by T. Edgar (Thomas Edgar) Pemberton

male · comedic · 1:05 min

My dear aunt, I do think myself fortunate. To be running about from morning to night, as I am, continually relieving my fellow creatures from the excruciating pangs of neuralgia, makes life one long summer's day of happiness. It makes me so light-hearted that I'm always singing, or humming, or whistling, and so I'm known among my friends as the musical instrument. (MRS. W: And what, may I ask, is your remedy?) The simplest thing in the world. You take--(feeling in his pocket for bottle)--Hullo! By Jove!--(seeing bottle on table)--Ah! yes, to be sure, I left it here. You take two or three drops of this colorless fluid, make the smallest of punctures in the lobe of the right ear, inject it, and the pain goes as if by magic. If you are suffering now, aunt-- (MRS. W: I am always suffering.) Then let me try.

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