Fifthly, there are five universals: the genus, the species, the differentia, the property, and the accident, without knowing which it is impossible to arrive at any satisfactory conclusions; I make great use of them, and know how important they are; ergo, I am five times doctor. (BAR: I must have patience.) Sixthly, number six is the number of work; I work incessantly for my own glory; ergo, I am six times doctor. (BAR: Well, well, speak as long as you like.) Seventhly, the number seven is the number of bliss; I possess a perfect knowledge of all that can produce happiness, and by my talents am happy myself. I am therefore forced to say of myself: O ter quaterque beatum! Eighthly, the number eight is the number of justice, on account of the equality which is found in it; the justice and prudence with which I measure and weigh all my actions make me eight times doctor. Ninthly, there are nine Muses, and I am equally the favourite of them all. Tenthly, one cannot pass number ten without repeating all the other numbers, and it is the universal number. Similarly, when people have found me, they have found the universal doctor; and I am in myself all the other doctors together. Thus, with the help of these plausible, true, demonstrative, and convincing reasons, you see that I am one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten times doctor.

Doc Monologue from The Jealousy of le Barbouillé (La Jalousie du Barbouillé)

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